Most of us find ourselves wanting to be healthier, fitter, stronger, faster, etc. etc. etc. But how do we do it? How do we make it stick? And most of all, how do we enjoy our life in the process? Throughout this blog, we are going to talk about all this and a few more things. Before we get into that, I’m going to share some of my story to give you a picture of how I have ended up at the point I am at now.
Where I’ve been
When I started to get into health and fitness, the big thing for me was going to the gym. I would hop on an elliptical and go and go and go. Although this helped a lot with losing some weight, my eating hadn’t changed. With that, I opted to eat less and being the young kid (21ish) that I was, I had no clue where to start except to eat less things. Spoiler: this was not the move I needed to make.
I didn’t know how to cook many things and in the midst of student teaching I began bringing an apple and some pretzels for lunch (I know! Not even any peanut butter!!) I would have a regular dinner (usually chicken, rice, veggies or trading the rice for pasta). As I said before, I was young and that made it a lot easier to muscle through not feeling the greatest. As time went on, I found myself getting hungry and would feel like I couldn’t, and shouldn’t, eat more food. Eventually, I felt so hungry that I would eat a lot; then I would feel guilty about eating that much and thus the cycle of restricting and then eating a lot began. I would not wish that cycle on anyone.
At the same time, I jumped into lifting weights (my first true love). I was pushing myself 6 days a week, lifting heavy, working hard, and feeling utterly exhausted. I should mention that I was also student teaching so my time was packed with trying to good job of teaching children and not messing up too bad. I was burning the candle at both ends in the hopes that I would look healthy.
I say all of this as a way to show what not to do. It wasn’t, and isn’t, sustainable and when you are trying to make a change to your life, it has to be something that you can do for the rest of your life. Hopefully, this will help you get your bearings about tackling your start on the road to a healthier, happier life.
What is healthy?
“According to The World Health Organization (WHO) the word health is, “a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being,” and this includes the use of personal and social resources to ensure an individual can function throughout their everyday lives.” With that definition, healthy is not just one look, it’s a feeling and I would further this to be about longevity. The things we do throughout our days impact our physical, mental, and social well-being and they impact the days that we are able to do those things.
For some people, this might mean that they have a six pack and run marathons and eat the same thing everyday. For others, it means being within a healthy weight range that allows them to go on a hike with their family and have an ice cream in town when they get back. It’s all individual and so nuanced. For instance, I have dieted down to a lower body weight a few times and have found it unsustainable. I feel like I look my best but I am worried about eating the wrong thing or missing a workout. I haven’t found the balance of wanting to look a certain way and being able to live life with the people that are important to me. I am a work in progress and am one to continue to follow these steps I talk about below to try and figure out what works best for me.
Does the number on the scale tell me I’m healthy?
So the answer is kind of. It is data that tells us how much we weigh at a given time. At some point, the pressure on your joints with excess weight will be a lot and it impacts your longevity. Conversely, there is a point of not having enough weight. At a point, you'll be exhausted, frail, and won't be able to do the things that make life great. One size fits all is not a thing. There are many factors that go into what we weigh: muscle, our jobs, stress, sleep, and our genetics. I put genetics last because, while it does play a role, it is out of your control. We didn’t pick our genes and so there is no reason to focus on something that can’t be changed. (That leads to some of us feeling upset and stuck. You're not stuck.
So the scale can matter, but take it with a grain of salt and talk with a healthcare professional about some of the nuances that come with it. Focusing solely on the scale as you are on your way to a healthy life sets you up for frustration and a “forget it” mentality.
What about BMI? I hear that doesn’t count for anything.
With BMI, it has some validity. Is it perfect? No.It doesn’t take into account muscle mass, but for the vast majority of people, it’s fairly accurate. Similar to weight, I would take it and keep moving to make the best choices that you can (it’s more data and data is a powerful piece of the puzzle). If you’re particularly muscular, or want another data point, another option is a waist to height ratio. This will give you a clearer picture of where you stand with excess body fat. With a waist to height ratio of around 0.5, you are considered a healthy individual.
All of that being said, BMI is a pretty good guideline for what ballpark you’re in. It’s important to be honest with yourself about your habits. If you’re fairly sedentary, and eating a lot of ultraprocessed foods, or hardly eating at all, there is room to improve habits to build a healthier, more enjoyable life.
SO WHAT DO I DO
The first step is to take a breath. We are about to head out on a marathon, don’t worry, you are capable of finishing this race and being better than when you started. There are 3 A’s that will help get you going and should be repeated over and over.
Assess
Action
Accountability
Assess your life, habits, and time. A mom of 3 kids with a full time job might have the same amount of hours in a day as me (a single person with a dog) but our time commitments are very different. What time do you have available and how can you make that work for your life? Be truthful about how you use your time… I’m looking at that screen time folks.
While we are talking truth time, let’s think about the things we are eating. At least in the beginning, it’s good to make note (either digitally or by hand) of all the things you eat. This can be eye opening and bring clarity to what you’re consuming. This is not judgment time. We are collecting knowledge. Knowledge is power. Take that power and use it to your advantage.
Action time! Alright, so we’ve got our power, let’s start using it. Start with something manageable and only choose ONE thing.
Here are some of my favorites:
Add protein to your first meal (an extra egg, some Greek Yogurt, add some protein powder to your cereal milk)
Go for an intentional walk one time each day (whatever time feels manageable to you)
Add a vegetable to your dinner plate, and eat it first.
Trade your frappuccino for an espresso drink (such as the brown sugar shaken espresso).
Take 5 minutes and do rounds of 10 pushups, squats, and lunges.
Don’t hit the snooze button and get out of bed right away.
But Diane, that’s hardly anything… anyone could do that
EXACTLY! Here is the secret. Everyone can be a healthy individual and it takes less than you think. Habits build up and those 5 minutes turn into 10… and then 15… and then you realize that you miss moving when you don’t get to go out and get going.
That extra egg at breakfast turns into a turkey sandwich with chips and carrots at lunch (with a greek yogurt dip). And then you’re getting the protein you need to feel full and satisfied after each meal.
Not hitting snooze gives you the 5 minutes to get that workout in and you feel energized for the day (and maybe you get a second piece of activity in) and you’re not rushing around to get to work on time.
Small wins yield big results. With all of this, showing up and giving your best is what we need to do. You probably won’t notice anything in a day… a week… maybe even a month. Keep putting in the work and the changes will become noticeable.
I don’t want to spend all my time preparing meals, avoiding social gatherings, or missing out on my kid’s soccer game to go to the gym. I have a life you know…
Trust and believe, life needs to be enhanced by your healthy habits not limited. Everything needs to be something you can do forever. With that, there is a time to set aside for building habits that give yourself the opportunity for a long and healthy life and a time to enjoy the moment. Everything can’t be YOLO but neither can everything. Here are a few questions that I like to ask myself when it comes to deciding whether to YOLO life or keep my healthy habits in place.
Is it a special occasion? I will be having a chocolate peanut butter cupcake for my birthday. I will not be having it on a random Thursday.
How consistent have I been lately? If my consistency calendar shows that I have been consistent for most of the last month (my number is 90%), let’s get that pastry at the coffee shop or let’s enjoy a night out with friends instead of doing my full workout (notice, I said full. I’m a strong proponent of something Joe Rinaldi (my friend and coach) says, “make adjustments, not excuses.”) **this is not to say that I earn the pastry by doing a workout or "being good". I can have it whenever I want. It's that I need parameters to make sure that I'm not just willy nilly treating myself to things that will not help me reach my goals.
Am I doing this to avoid what people will say? People can share their thoughts with you and make you feel like you should be doing something different. It’s your life. At the end of the day, you’ve got to decide what you want to do with it. If you only do things because it is what people want you to do, you’re going to be miserable. Remember that.
*Caveat: Someone holding you accountable is a bit different. It should not be from a place of shame and making you feel terrible about yourself. It should be from a place of caring and wanting the best for you.
*I heard this from Jordan Syatt and loved it so much I want to share it with you. If you decide to not partake in dessert, or drinks, or not skipping your workout, you don’t have to explain yourself. You could say you are doing a challenge. People love that stuff and will usually leave it at that. But at the end of the day, your choice is your choice nobody is owed an explanation for choosing what will help you feel your best.
If you’re looking for tips about meal prep, check out this blog (scroll to the end of it for a few of my go to recipes).
Accountability is our third step.
Accountability can be something like a checkoff, or a marble in a jar, or checking in with another person. When it comes to accountability, it’s really all about anything that will help you know you did what you said you would. I love a consistency calendar that will track an action item. This calendar is best physical and someplace where you can see it and regularly use it. The phrase out of sight, out of mind is so accurate when it comes to accountability. SO if you want to be accountable and do something, put it in a place that will be right in your face.
But Diane, a piece of paper isn’t enough for me. This is a great time to talk about a coach. Whether it be for nutrition, fitness, mindset, or whatever else, a coach can, and should, hold you accountable. They should give you support with your goals, help you find the bridge to get where you want to go, walk beside you in the process, talk through sticking points, and provide an honest dialogue about what is happening and adjustments that need to be made. If this all sounds great to you, we would love the opportunity to talk about your goals and how our coaching can help you get there.
How long is this going to take?
The short answer. Longer than you want. I know. I’m sorry. It’s a rough point that we all have to accept. Sustainable progress towards a healthy life is like coming in from the rain. You aren’t instantly dry and comfy. It’s a process with many steps and a gradual change from totally uncomfortable to slightly less uncomfortable, to tolerable, to comfy.
Changing clothes is like getting a workout in (they usually feel so hard at the beginning and you think “What good is this doing?”). Going to your next workout is like keeping those clothes you have on dry and sitting by a fire to keep them warm. It keeps feeling better and better as you sit in them and learn the new feel of these new pieces of you. Having a warm tea is like choosing to add vegetables to your meals. It might be hard to eat at first and you don’t feel, or see the results right away, but the warmth starts to spread and soon you are feeling better and more energized. Grabbing a blanket is like preparing your food for the week coming. You don’t feel warm instantly, and as time goes on you start to be able to relax and know that the warmth has helped you feel your best. All these steps get you closer to the comfort of a healthy life.
I would be remiss if I didn’t bring up plateaus. These pesky sticking points are tough to break through and easier to say, “this isn’t working. I give up!” I urge you to not give up. Our progress is never linear and to expect things to always go smoothly in the direction we want would be setting ourselves up for failure. It can take time to get through these and as much as you want to give up, stay the course. It will come together. There have been times in my own experience a plateau seems to last forever (a few weeks to a month) and then there is a boom of progress. Keep the process going and stick to the actions that you know are best for your health and the results will come.
So Diane, you talked a lot about what to do but there still isn’t a roadmap
I know. And that is because there is no one way to get to be a healthy person. It all has to make sense for you and work for your life. If I had a step by step guide that works for everyone, I would gladly share it… but it just doesn’t exist. Remember, Assess, Action, Accountability. You can do this and you are going to crush it. Treat this with curiosity and keep looking for what works well and make adjustments when things don't go as well as you hoped. If you are looking for help creating your personal roadmap to build your healthy habits, click here and send us a message that says, “3 As” and we will be in touch.
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